"He who passively accepts evil is as much involved as he who helps to perpetrate it." Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
So begins Chapter 7 of the "anti-bullying" book. In this passage, there is a lot of discussion about the role of the bystander. Life is so ironic sometimes as Morgan and I were discussing (Tuesday--she had reread Night by Elie Weisel) how the Germans and Poles stood by and did nothing while Hitler and his goons put to death 6,000,000 people. How did this happen? In the same way we inoculate ourselves to bullying today (remember the Nazis didn't begin with the Death Camps but they started out as a bunch of bullies). Now I'm not saying that every child who bullies will grow up and become a Nazi. I am saying we MUST model and teach our children (and ourselves) not to ignore bullying behavior (yes, I'm reading these posts Robbie, Macie, Jean! Plus nobody better cut in front of any of you in line when I'm there!!! I won't be silent on your behalf. LOL). I also love the place in the book where it states, "People don't get others in trouble. A person gets in trouble due to his/her own actions." And finally, the chapter ends with another quote from Dr. King, "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." It is our bound duty to our KES children to create a culture of involvement and an environment of safety. That's why we must teach them to speak up and speak up correctly for one another. . . .
Finish reading chapters 7, 8, and 9. Feel free to utilize one (or more ) of the activities in the chapters in either your Morning Meeting or in some way throughout the school day. Blog about the experience (good or bad!). No bullying here!
"Likes" and "Yikes"
ReplyDeleteDetermining Friendship Qualities
Activity from the book
How to Stop Bullying and Social Aggression
1. We had a class discussion about the good ("Likes") and bad ("Yikes") qualities of being a friend.
2. Each student made a list of 5 friendship "Likes" and 3 "Yikes" qualities.
3. We used those individual lists to create a collaborative graphic organizer that displays our class friendship "Likes" and "Yikes" qualities. We placed our "Likes" inside the personal boundary & "Yikes" on the outside. We learned that we need to be the type of person that we would want to have as a friend. (See graphic organizer that is on p. 138 of the How to Stop Bullying book.)
Second grade teachers collaborated and had students put on a skit about the right way and the wrong way to deal with a bully. Students were videoed using a teacher computer. Teachers then showed the finished work to individual classes and discussed the finished product. Students wrote down their thoughts and feelings about the video and shared with their classmates. Finished documents were displayed in the classroom to remind us all how to handle a bully and what we should and should not do as bystanders and friends. This activity really helped students realized the important role they share in each other’s lives, to treat everyone with respect and caring. “Stand up for what is right, even if you stand alone.” Anonymous
ReplyDeleteThis was a great idea! Students love watching themselves on video, so this was the perfect way to teach a lesson while keeping them actively engaged through the entire process. I'm sure they all learned something valuable that will actually stick with them forever!
DeleteI think modeling for students is a concrete way to demonstrate how to treat others. The skit that was acted out by second grade students showed just that. First, they demonstrated the wrong way to treat a bully,with bystanders laughing with the bully. After that,they showed the right way to treat a bully,with the bystanders taking the side of the victim. This allowed students to understand the help that they could be if they see someone being bullied.
DeleteI used the "What's a Bystander to Do?" activity during a language group of three students. This gave them the opportunity to consider the question, then learn to put into words what he/she would actually do in a series of "situations." In the beginning, it was difficult for these students to move beyond saying, "I would tell my teacher," or "I wouldn't say anything." We discussed five possible situations they could encounter at school and how they would/should respond. Some of the situations involved students being picked on because of their speech or for having to "go to speech." By the end of the activity, each student was able to identify and put into words the five expected/appropriate responses and why ignoring bullying is not acceptable.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to give these students strategies to handle a situation they will probably find themselves in at some time! Students that are pulled out (for any reason) often do encounter situations where they are made to feel bad because of the fact that they need additional help to be successful.
DeleteI used the same concept as Robyn. What's a Bystander to Do? I used different scenarios and let the children decide what they should do. We head a discussion about the choices they made. We also discussed alternate actions they could take. It gave the children a realistic view of how things may look and feel like before they are ever placed in that sort of situation. It also gave them a greater sense of how it makes them and others feel.
ReplyDeleteI used the Likes and Yikes activity. The students and I discussed what is a friendship and the qualities that friends have with each other. After talking about friendship qualities, the students and I produced and shared a full organizer that exhibits our class friendship “Likes and Yikes” behavior.
ReplyDeleteIn my class we used storyboardthat and created bullying scenarios.I gave guidelines of no physical violence and weapons. We focused most on name calling and exclusion. Our last issue of Scholastic News focused on exclusion so they had other ideas to work with, too. Some students worked alone and others were paired. Some even created others at home. Then, we were able to share them. Some were printed and others were emailed to Mr. Marcum and Dr. Hendon. Students really enjoyed this and it was very engaging. I was pleased with the finished products.
ReplyDeleteI did the Likes and Yikes activity with my children. We displayed the diagram in our room. Today one of my girls slapped one of my boys at P.E. and we talked about the situation at group time. One of my boys said " that's one of our bad words, Mrs. Smith (slap was one of our yikes)". I really think the activities in this book have reminded us to talk about what is acceptable and what is not. My group needs the visuals and examples.
ReplyDeleteLike Sharron's class all of the children in my class created a storyboard on their laptops showing someone being bullied and showing ways to stop the bullying situation. Before the children created the storyboards, we had discussed different ways people are bullied (name calling, hitting or kicking, exclusion, gossiping). We had also discussed different ways to stop bullying situations. Then(again like Sharrons's class) we read an article in our Scholastic Newspaper about exclusion and how exclusion is a form of bullying. Then for several mornings during our morning meeting time, we focused on how bystanders can help to stop bullying. I used several of the situations from Chapter 7 to talk about times when it is important to tell an adult or situations when the children could either stop the bullying by walking away, by telling the bully to stop, or by helping another child to get away from a bullying situation. We discussed how important it is to not encourage a bully, and how the children need to stand up for each other. We focused on the importance of not gossiping or spreading rumors and how important it is to include everyone. It was after several morning discussions that my students created their storyboards that showed a bullying situation and how to stop it. I was impressed with the different ways that the children showed how to stop a bully. Then some of my students sent their storyboards to Dr. Hendon and to Mr. Marcum. I hope these storyboards will help the children to realize that they have the power to stop bullying, and how important it is stand up for others.
ReplyDeleteLike several others, I used the “Likes and Yikes” activity as part of the morning meeting. We had previously discussed the good (likes) and bad (yikes) qualities of a friend. One day I had the students write “Likes” and the next I had them write “Yikes” and we discussed these attributes after our morning message. Like Ginger and Sharron, I also had my students read the Scholastic News article about bullying by exclusion. This led to a discussion about the importance of doing the right thing when you see someone being mistreated or excluded. Autumn and I worked together with our students to create an anti-bullying rap video. This activity kept the students engaged and reinforced some of the important lessons we had learned.
ReplyDeleteFor the bullying project, my students created digital stories about situations dealing with bullying. They had to show a situation and the solution in their story. After the stories were created as digital stories, my students made them into PowerPoint presentations and shared with their parents via email. As several other 3rd grade teachers have already stated, my students also read the story in Scholastic News about exclusion and had discussions about it.
ReplyDeleteI also did the activity Likes and Yikes with my class. We discussed how friends are so important to us. We listed qualities on the board that we wanted in a friend(sharing, helpful, nice). We also made a list of bad qualities that they did not want in a friend(name calling, mean, not sharing). We had a great discussion. I feel like talking about each of these qualities helped the children see that being a bully is not acceptable. We need to stand up for each other and stop bullying.
ReplyDeleteWe incorporated our scootpad (blog) project with the bullying project. The kids had to pick a friend and blog about their bullying experience. We used the book Papagayo as a reference.This is a story that we read in first grade. The book contains several good references and bullying examples. We talked about what bullying is and what tattling is. The kids then had to tell me in a whole group setting what a good friend is and what a bully is (morning meeting). The kids are on their way to learning how to stand strong as individuals and as a group.
ReplyDeleteBefore and after completing the bully skit, our class discussed the best ways to handle a bully. Several of the ideas were very good and several were not. Some children wanted to be physical with the bully, not a good idea, especially if he is bigger/or armed. We discussed what could happen if you confronted him using force. Then, the group brainstormed ideas on how to handle him the "right" way. Telling a grown-up was the number one solution.
ReplyDeleteWe discussed friends and what it means to be a good friend. Things we like about our friends. Some things our friends do might hurt our feelings. We gave examples. The point was to try to get them to think about what they say and their actions and to try to get them to be a good friend.
ReplyDeleteI also did the activity Likes and Yikes. Now when someone does something that is not very nice I have heard the children say "Yikes!" For some of the children it was much easier to come up with the Yikes instead of the likes so we spent more time on the Likes. We talked about things that we could do to be a good friend.
ReplyDeleteMy class like Sharron and Ginger's class made Digital Storyboards about Bullies. I was impressed with some of the stories my students made up. We have discussed bullies all year and had a big discussion on being a Bystander. It was interesting listening to how they felt about this. Some said that they have been the bystander many times but were always afraid they would be hurt if they stood up for their friends. They didnt want to get beat up or made fun of. So we did a little skit and their eyes were open to some things they could have done that I hope they will now to save someone from being bullied.
ReplyDeleteLike the others we have been discussing bullying during morning meeting. We completed the Scholastic News article about Bullying by Exclusion. I don't think my students thought that leaving someone out was bullying. After we discussed how it made the person being left out feel, they came to the conclusion that it was bullying. I worked with Miss Wigley to complete a podcast about bullying. We chose to do a rap so the students would stay engaged, remember the words, and think about the words.
ReplyDeleteI also find that students do not realize all the actions that constitute bullying. I think that most students think only of physical bullying like kicking, pushing, hitting, and taking or damaging a person's property. I have found that this years' push to educate our students on bullying has been very much needed. I only hope that they are taking some of this information home to their parents because I am sure some of them also think of bullying as being physical without the recognition of other types of bullying like verbal, cyber and relational.
DeleteChapter 9 begins by discussing how we think of social aggression as a "girl problem". I have to admit, I am completely guilty of this incorrect thinking as 3 girls in my classroom immediately popped into my head. So, I began to observe and listen to my students to see if I saw evidence of boys being left out of groups and guess what?? It really happened! The difference I noted is that more often, the boys didn't tell me about it and the left-out girls were quick to come and tell me.
ReplyDeleteThis led to a discussion of how it feels to be left out. We discussed a blast off passage we read in which some girls decide to have their own exclusive club and leave everyone out. In the end, the girls decide it isn't as much fun being exclusive as it is with all their friends. Our discussion opened the door to having children share times they have been left out. Amazingly, almost everyone has experienced this at one time or another. We talked about what a person can do when they are left out, what friends can do when they realize they are leaving someone out, and what to do when you are tempted to leave someone out of your group.
We discussed like several have mentioned the Likes or Yikes! I have also found like Tiffany, that I hear several say Yikes if someone said something hurtful! Of course we have to take time to address it and talk about what we should have said instead! I have used this in my morning message as a way to help discuss it.
ReplyDeleteIn my small group sessions, we discussed the things we liked about our friends and how to be a friend to others. We also discussed behaviors that are not acceptable of friends. Some of the things the kids mentioned were fighting, yelling, hitting, or people being mean to you. We really stressed the use of saying kind words to one another. I have a student that requires a lot of modeling of appropriate social skills. We often role model the appropriate behaviors of friends, such as waiting turns, using kind words, and sharing.
ReplyDeleteI have used the model of "What's a Bystander To Do" in my small groups to discuss plans of action with my students. I have also been able to use this information as a parent as Claudia has brought home some situations where she has been a bystander to bullying this year. Specifically, she has recently had a heavy heart over one specific student who is being teased and "made fun of" by others. I have used the example of "What's a Bystander To Do" with her to help her learn not only her responsibility as a bystander but strategies she can use to help stand up for the student. She is very sensitive to this issue but has demonstrated more confidence in her ability to "do something" rather than just feel sad for the student who is a victim.
ReplyDeleteLike Robbie, I tend to think of Social Aggression more with girls and NOTICE it more with my girls each year. But as I've paid more attention to my boys, I realize that they do also tend to leave out one or two of the boys in my class. It just seems to manifest in different ways than the girls. I agree with Robbie that the girls make SURE you know it! They are much more vocal and quick to express their issues. We have pantomimed social situations where a child is being excluded and then invited in to an activity. We discussed how it might feel to be on either side of the situation.
ReplyDelete